All of My Old Friends

All of my old friends were early risers
They'd be sitting there at breakfast with their girls
When I'd come down hungover, my dressing-gown half-open
With make-up on and my hair still up in curls

I'd have pulled myself up hard off of the sofa
Sucking coffee straight out the machine
I'd be a mess, half-dressed but never the less, these girls that were sleeping with my best friends
Would all tell me sometimes they 'thought' of me

It's Ok if you don't believe me
Most of what I say up here ain't true
But don't say I didn't warn you
In the morning when she calls you
And says something about me reminds her of you

They said if I repeat it they'll deny it
So I promise I won't mention any names
Recounting tales of youthful misadventure when you're old
Either evokes a sense of pride or sense of shame

And shame has always held the door out for me
Whereas pride ran out on me when I was young
I pretended to be you without all your imperfections
And to perfection it's the closest thing I've come

It's Ok if you don't believe me
Most of what I say up here ain't true
But don't say I didn't warn you
In the morning when she calls you
And says something about me reminds her of you

One time I fell in love
But it didn't last too long
See, I got an honest gypsy's heart but a serpent's tongue
I hope you never set
But if you do I pray regret
Don't find you telling misadventure you were wrong

All of my old friends are late for breakfast
This is their alarm call ringing now
It's always morning somewhere to somebody and strong coffee
Can make broken hearts and heads and fists just pound

It's Ok if you don't believe me
Most of what I say up here ain't true
But don't say I didn't warn you
In the morning when she calls you
With a voice that starts to crack
As if she's holding something back
As if all truth's been held to ransom
When she says she finds me handsome
And says something about me reminds her of you